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10/6/08

My Dash!!

Hello random visistors. You have landed in an unknown zone! Please sit back and relax. This is the journey of my life. It started on a cold morning on November 21st, at 3:33 a.m. I dont know when its going to end or how long I have left. But I once read somewhere that the beginning or the end were not important. When you die and the dates are put on your tombstone to remember you, what will really matter is the dash between your date of birth and your death because that ’s what people are going to remember. How do you wanna spend your dash? I dont know how I wanna spend my dash yet. I am still looking, searching for myself, and I will invite you to look and search with me. It took me 24 years of existence, experience and studying to finally realize that the corporate world was not for me. After finishing highschool, I went to a business school in Boston and graduated magna cum laude with a bachelor’s degree in Finance. I had dreams of tapping into the Investment Banking world. I was already seeing myself being one of those prominent bankers on Wall-Street who have an 80hour/week and I thought that would make me happy. I have always been very ambitious, you will give me that. At 6, I thought I would be the UN secretary when I grow up, but the business world and the thirst for money, the greed of getting bigger and richer would destroy that dream. I beleived in the corporate world, I beleived in jumping the corporate ladder, I beleived in being a shark and doing whatever was necessary to jump that ladder and be at the top. I beleived in business without friendship or emotions. Waoww! It took me 4 years of college and two years of Grad school to realize that I hated the corporate World.

Corporate world , a cold place! A so cold place that all your degrees, papers, homework and everything that you’ve accomplished in college could not keep you warm. Cold because it is a harsh world. Cold because you have a 9-5 where you make an entity known as a corporation richer, the top people being further at the top and the people at the bottom just keep going further down. And this is the world I beleived in, the world I wanted to conquer and that I was so proud of being part of. Yes, business school makes you that type of person. For 4 years, they program you to be the number one Bullcrapper in each and every situation! They kill every emotion you once felt and make you a corporate robot. One who would be programmed to deliver whatever Mister Corporation wanted. Mister Corporation is the one I’ve learned to revere and serve during my 4 years of undergrad. I learned that the most important thing, actually the only thing worthwile was to increase shareholder’s value and that was only doable by slaving more and more for Mister Corporation. Now, when Mr Corporation is happy, he will certainly give you bonuses, sometimes a bigger paycheck but at the end of the day, whose happiness is more important? Yours or Mr Corporation’s happiness?

I am far from being the girl I used to be. Today, I beleive in so may different things, I have so many hopes and dreams I never thought I’d ever have. Today, I am a woman, a wife and a hijabee. I want to be closer to Allah and that is my main goal. I started wearing the hijab not too long ago and I am still adjusting to my new life as a hijabee. At the same time, I couldn’t be happier to be closer to Allah and to keep on learning and improving on a daily basis. I don’t wanna spend my dash to be the best business woman I can be. I have different priorities now. I want to spend my dash to strive for Jannah. I want to be a better wife, a better muslimah, a better person to this world. There are so many things I need to be working on. There are so many new things I aspire to do. This is just the beginning…..So sit back and relax! The journey just began!

13 comments:

muslimahh said...

You're an excellent writer mashallah! I look forward to more posts inshallah!

hijabee said...

Muslimah, you are too sweet :) Thanks for commenting. Your blog is lovely as well mashallah :)

Yayemarie said...

Sista
je suis trop contente fiere de toi oh My God you just dont know you just made my day, I respect your decision and it fills me with joy for you je nai pas encore lu ton blog depuis le debut but as soon as i get to work ill do it
ive been thinking abt this for a long time and to see another sista taking this decision just fills
me up
May Allah be with you on this new journey begening , may you be a witness and keep sharing ur wisdom with us
im so glad i got to know u:)
yaye

hijabee said...

Yayemarie,
Thanks for stopping by and for the good wishes! I've been thinking about it for a long time and it just happened. One of these days I will blog on how I started wearing the hijab! Inshallah, Allah will make it easy for you as well! In the meanwhile just stick in there & keep on doing waht you do best. Love ya!

Amina said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
hijabee said...

Amina,

No, you got it wrong! loll I know who you're thinking about though. Totally wrong!!! Anyhow, I know you will never guess even though you and I spoke few weeks ago loll. I will tell you who it is on your blog...:)

gazelledusahara said...

This was a beautiful piece. Definitely food for thought, I have never thought about it like that.
Jazaks :)

Sacrifice4Allah said...

MashaAllah what a beautiful introduction!!

I look forward to visiting your blog again!

Hicham said...

Salam Sister,

Macha'allah; nice blog indeed. I justt landedd here via Facebook NetworkBlogs and enjoyed reading this intro so I'm Glad to find this blog and looking forward for visiting again.

Keep up the good work, sis :)

Your bro,
Hicham

Everyday Muslimah said...

Assalam u alaikum!

Wow, MashahAllah, your blog is insightful, you caught my attention! I'm glad to have found it through another blog. Your corporate story reminded me of myself being in a similar situation. I didn't go to grad school but had dreams to until I worked and realized it wasn't for me. Now I'm looking for better things- most importantly being a servant to Allah and earing His pleasure.

I've recently started blogging and currently doing a Ramadan diary. I invite you to visit at www.everydaymuslimah-everydaymuslimah.blogspot.com.

I look forward to reading more of your post and probably go through your archive for what I missed. =)

Congratulations on your baby! & Ramadan Kareem!

Hijabee said...

Everyday Muslimah,
Thanks for stopping by and for your comment. I will be sure to visit your blog and read about your Ramadan diary. Ramadan Mubarak :)

3th3.wordpress.com said...

Nice dash :)
you know at least you caught yourself early, some people would live their whole lives loving to hate their jobs and wake up one day 80 years later and find out they've made a big mistake.
I guess the alternative is an uplift =D alhamdulelah
I enjoyed reading your posts and your "about me". It was nice meeting you.

Raihana Nazri said...

hey dear, know what..im reading from irbid, jordan but actually i'm from malaysia..love to hear from friends aorund the world..
ana uhibbuki fillah