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11/25/08

Dealing with Stress


What do you do when you are stressed out of your mind? Sometimes, situations, work, school or even family could add an ounce of stress in our life. How do you deal with it? Some people deal with it by going on a shopping spree and are called compulsive shoppers. They shop to deal with their stressful life. Compulsive Shopping hides a more serious problem and is only a symptom of the serious issues people might be dealing with. Drug addicts or alcoholic just have different symptoms for the same issue. They smoke or drink to escape from their stressfull life. Just like they need a high to get on, the compulsive shopper gets a high from shopping. Shopping is not just a pleasure anymore, its more than that, its not a want anymore, but becomes a need. I know, because I too have been a compulsive shopper at times. I too,used shopping to get by or forget about stressful events. The truth is, after that initial adrenaline rush, after the euphoria of adding a new dress, pair of shoes or whatever it is to your collection, you are not any better. Just like the alcoholic will drink more and more, you will shop more and more without ever curing your stress. Why? Because you are not being honest with yourself, you are not tackling the issues, you are using something to get rid of the symptom, but not the desease.Stress, doctors say, usually comes from fear of the unknown, the future, and death. However, Allah (SWT) has already provided us with prevention against those fears. "And We will most certainly try you with somewhat of fear and hunger and loss of property and lives and fruits; and give good news to the patient" (2:155). The Prophet Muhammad (saw) said, "Your most ardent enemy is your evil self which resides within your body. If this soul is not checked, it will lead to unusual stress" (Bukhari).
From experience, I have come to realize that there is only one way of dealing with stress : It's to identify the cause and then work to reduce or eliminate that cause.
A lecturer, when explaining stress management to an audience, raised a glass of water and asked, "How heavy is this glass of water? "

Answers called out ranged from 8oz. to 20oz. The lecturer replied, "The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long you try to hold it. If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, 'll have an ache in my right arm. If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an ambulance.

In each case, it's the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes. He continued, "And that's the way it is with stress management. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won't be able to carry on."

"As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again. When we're refreshed, we can carry on with the burden.Life's problems are something like this. Hold it for a few minutes in your head and they seem okay. Think of them for a long time and they begin to ache. Hold it even longer and they begin to paralyze you. You will not be able to do anything'.
So, before you return home tonight, put the burden of work down. Don't carry it home. You can pick it up tomorrow. Whatever burdens you're carrying now, let them down for a moment if you can. Relax; pick them up later after you've rested.
'It's important to think of the challenges (problems) in your life, but EVEN MORE IMPORTANT is to have trust in Allah (SWT) and to 'put them down' at the end of every day before you go to sleep. That way, you are not stressed, you wake up every day fresh and strong and can handle any issue, any challenge that comes your way!'

So, as it becomes time for you to leave office today, Remember to 'PUT THE GLASS DOWN TODAY' and have tranquility by putting trust in Almighty Allah (SWT).
Tell to your mind every day before you go to sleep: ."YAA AYYATUHAN NAFSUL MUTMAINNAH, IRJI'II ILAA RABBIKI RADHIYATAN MARDHIYYAH, FADKHULII FII IBAADII WADKHULII JANNATII". (Al-Fajr 89:27-30)"O soul that is at rest satisfied. Return to your Lord well-pleased (with Him), well-pleasing (Him). So, enter among My servants, and enter into my Paradise"

Even for super-achievers, you get more out of life when you learn to balance it. So as you are gearing up for your achievements for this Winter season, never forget to step back, take a deep breath and relax a bit. Leave the stress behind, and the next day you will move even further ahead because you have conquered stress, rather than letting it conquer you.

12 comments:

Amina said...

great post!!
how do i deal with stress?
i bake and/or eat chocolate
i also talk to no one...
does it help? nope...
i read once Stop worry and start living by dan carnegie..and it helped a lot!

this post is very helpful too!!

Yaya said...

Exactly. I had stress-related 'numbing' activities for years, until I realized that I was actually repressing memories from childhood.....

Mona said...

Another great post Hijabee, I like to color with my kids to de-stress or take a walk.

Mina said...

Wow great post, I deal with stress by eating lots and losts of chocolate and shopping or taking a long walk, I know its bad I should figure out another way to deal with my stress:(

Hijabee said...

Amina.
I eat a lot when I'm stressed too :)

Yaya,
Sometimes stress can come from feelings that were repressed for a long time

Mona,
Thanks. Walking is good and it's great exercise as well.

Mina,
I do that a lot myself and it's not really the best cure for it lol.

NATASHAAMINA said...

A very good and again also useful post Hijabee :)!When I'm in stress,my biggest problem is that I can't pray.I simply like to hide from Allah.Hm,as if he couldn't see me :)!I wrote about this in my BLOG.Anyways,when I'm really in a big stress I become very concentrated,to the point that it can be desturbing for people around me.I stop talking :) and I go after solving my problems.All that goes through my mind in such times is:"Girl get back to yourself and than you can continue with your life!"Than I'd forget to eat,wash myself and oh my look in those days is terrible :))).
As regarding to much eating of the sweets,I'd be a big lier if I'd say I don't do that.It all comes back in the end and when the problem is solved...oh,better not to leave any sweets around me :)))!I eat them like a reward.
Hijabee your posts are really funky!

muslimahh said...

This was such a great post mashallah! I've been really stressed out lately and I this post is exactly what I needed. Jazakallah hijabee!

hijabee said...

Natashaamina,
As I told you in your blog, I think praying would really help you when you're stressed. IT's such a soothing experience. You should try it once and see if you feel any different, or at least just talk to Allah when you're stressed. Ask Him to help you and talk to Him as a friend, He always listens.

Muslimahh,
Sorry to hear that you've been stressed lately. Hope you feel better inshallah.

Hajar said...

Such a brilliant post! ^^ Not so sure on how I handle stress. Most people have the idea that I'm stress-free. Haha~

A quote that I find myself reciting whenever I have an obstacle;

"For every problem under the sun, there is a solution or there is none. If there's a solution, go and find it. If there isn't, never mind it."

hijabee said...

Hajar,
Great quote :) Thanks for sharing

Jamaican Hijabi said...

Good post, I totally agree with what you said "From experience, I have come to realize that there is only one way of dealing with stress : It's to identify the cause and then work to reduce or eliminate that cause"

I used to shop when I got stressed, then now I eat chocolate and anything sweet, I just get cravings for sweets. I got over the shopping while stressed phase, now I need to get over this eating while stressed phase LOL. I have however identified the cause and am trying to work on eliminating it InshaAllah, before I gain 20 lbs :)

hijabee said...

Jamaican Hijabi,
Thank you for your comment. Good luck in coping with that. I don't like stress at all. May Allah protect us from it.